Tales of AgaThor the Super Kitten, Part 2: AgaThor’s Christmas List

I am drowning in paper work. Technology is supposed to make life simpler and keeping track of expenses easier. I’m not buying it. I feel like balancing my checkbook has become a daily chore. As I stare at the receipts, the bills, and my checkbook, my mind begins to wander. Just as I begin to daydream about slaying Darkspawn in a Dragon Age-like universe, something pulls me back to reality. I look down and AgaThor has a paw on my leg…and a piece of paper in his mouth.

Me: “AgaThor, what is that in your mouth? Are you playing with mommy’s bills? PLEASE don’t chew those up.”

AgaThor spits it out of his mouth and looks at me like the bratty hormonal teenage boy he is and says, “It’s my CHRISTMAS LIST! You haven’t even asked me what I want for Christmas yet. You realize it is December, right?”

Me: “You made a Christmas list? I change your diapers, give you a bath, feed and house you daily, serve as your unpaid PR agent, and you made me a Christmas list?”

AgaThor: “I’ve been very nice and saved numerous two-legged and four-legged citizens in my first nine months on this earth. I’m a superkitten. I HAVE NEEDS! And, I’m not a big fan of this speciest attitude of yours. What, humans deserve Christmas presents but badass superkittens don’t?”

He is right. If the twenty-five people on my Christmas shopping list deserve presents, why doesn’t he? Recently, he hasn’t been the nicest kitten I’ve ever met. He’s going through puberty and hasn’t been neutered. He is quite the moody one. However, the number of insects he has saved me from in the last two months alone is noteworthy. Despite that, I am still skeptical about his supposed crime-fighting and life-saving adventures.

I have to admit that his guilt trip worked like a charm. I give him a little pet on the head and reach for his Christmas list saying, “Ok, let’s see what’s on this Christmas list of yours.”

DSCN2858

In case you can’t read his horrible handwriting or understand his horrible drawings, I’ve transcribed the Christmas list for you:

Aga4’s Xmas List

  1. Jet pack
  2. Manly superhero kitten bed
  3. Catmobile
  4. CATNIP!
  5. Police scanner
  6. Cat Cave

Am I the only one that noticed that his Xmas list is vaguely shaped like the state of Ohio? Anyway…

Me: “Why do you need a jetpack when you can fly?”

AgaThor: “It takes a lot of effort. I get SO tired.”

Me: “And, you need a car and a secret lair?”

AgaThor: “What superhero doesn’t?”

Me: “Superman doesn’t need a car.”

AgaThor: “Your mom.”

Me: “What kind of comeback was that?”

AgaThor: “OH MY GOD! A HARMLESS FLYING INSECT! Don’t worry, mom, I’ll save you!”

Me: “Thanks?”

To be continued…

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One comment on “Tales of AgaThor the Super Kitten, Part 2: AgaThor’s Christmas List

  1. Love the idea of the Agathor Cat Cave. Tiny cat-sized computer to analyze nip samples. Small glass chambers to hold prior super suits.

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